Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Waking up that morning I could tell that something was different. I couldn't put my finger on it but it just seemed that way. The nurses all came in as usual, the doctor came in to check on me and said everything looked ok. But standing up I noticed that it seemed like I was leaking all over again like when my water orignially broke. The nurses said that it was usual, sometimes the water around the baby would build up all over again in their head plugged the hole, she must have been moving around and that made me leak.

The doctors had ordered another ultrasound though, like they had said they would a few days before to check on the girls. When doing the ultrasound the tech had said that it looked like there was nearly no water around Charlie (baby C), which had worried me and then all the leaking had made sense. They had been moving around but they were not cooperating for the nurses when they were to do the monitoring. One would move around too much, the other was in a horrible position and seemed to be sleeping, and the other...who knows I can't rememeber now.

Well visitors thoughout the day and naps here and there was what I had managed to get done. My son's other grandmother had come to visit for a while later that night and was my last visitor of the evening. During the visit the nurses had said that they were due to do the girls monitoring and wanted to know if I wanted her to go, I didn't mind her being there, all modesty had been lost months and days ago when getting checked in! So while the nurses where trying as usual to monitor the girls they noticed that their heart rates were unusually high and didn't seem to be going down. They were having a hard time getting a long pattern due to them moving as well. I could tell there was some worry on their faces which made me a little anxious. At this point I had wished that I had told his grandmother to go. I think that she could see that I was worried and decided on her own to go home. About 40 minutes into the monitoring the nurses called the doctor and told him what was going on, they were ordered to do temp, BP and blood draws to check my white blood count. About an hour later when the nurse came in I knew it was bad news. My blood count was elevated and the doctor was going to take the girls out because there was an infection starting.

Nothing but panic had set in, all I could do was worry that the girls weren't ready to come out, they were too small. Not to mention the fact that when I had a C-section with Anthony it was a horrible experience and I nearly threw up thinking about everything I was about to go though again. I was terrified. Cisco was the calm during the storm, or at least that was the face and front that he had put on. He called everyone that needed to be called so that they knew what was going on. My mom came down with the kids so they could be there and wait.

I was wheeled into the OR and given a Spinal, which by the way is the worst pain ever, the nurses were the best, so nice, thoughtful, full of hope and happiness for us. I was a little freaked out when I saw how big the room was and all the things that were in there, there were a pretty good size team of nurses from the NICU getting things prepared at their isolettes and waving hello.

When the nurse laid me on the table and got me covered she had asked me what kind of music I liked I told her the Beatles, since that was the only thing I could get out at the time. The doctor came in and said that he was going to take good care of me and the girls and then began. I remember that Billy Joel was playing on the stereo and it was "She's always a woman to me". The doctor had said, "for the rest of your life you will remember this song." I think it was a little after that Cisco had come in.

The doctor and Cisco told me when my Baby A came out...11:55pm, Catherine. I could hear a little cry. Sounded like a kitten or a puppy. Next 11:56pm Baby B...Cecilia. The doctor said that he had a hard time getting to the next baby that she was wedged up so high. Baby C...11:58pm, Charlie. All my babies were out, I didn't get to see anyone. They were taken to the isolettes and started to be tended to. Cisco went with the NICU doctor and headed out with them when they were ready. He got to see the girls first, he got to get their weight and their measurements.

When I was all sewn back together I was taken to recovery which at some point I had fallen asleep, but when I woke up the morphine that they shot into my spine did a number on me. I'm glad that I was still numb when I threw up, cause other wise it would have really hurt. Cisco tried to tell me a bit about the girls, but to this day I don't remember much...too many drugs I'm guessing.

But the doctor was right, to this day when I hear that Billy Joel song I cry. I hug my girls and look at each of them. I think of how small they were when they were born and how much of a miracle they really were and are.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Monday - October 11, 2010

Nothing too exciting happens in the hospital, the girls have been behaving and nothing changes over the next couple of hours.

The leaking of my water has come to a stop which is a welcome surprise and all I can think of is when can I take a shower and can it be as soon as possible. I begged the nurses and they called the doctors and asked what they thought about it, when I was flagged ok to take one, I practically ran to do so.

I think the thing that was the most frustrating was being alone. It was nice when during the day I would get visitors. I would have friends from church come by and visit for a bit and Olivia and the girls grammy would come by and visit too.

I think the one visit that I got that made me even more paranoid about the girls arrival was a visit from one of the NICU doctors. She made me nervous because she talked about all the complications and things that happen to most preterm babies. I wanted to run from the room. She asked if I had any questions and I was just in shock and what was worse was that I was alone when she came in, Cisco was at home with Kipper and the kids so he missed out on the enlightning visit. (I was shocked several months later so see that I was billed for the doctor coming to give me a NICU heads up, pissed me off)

All I could really do was try to keep myself busy. I think the highlight of the day was choosing what I was going to eat for the day. Since I had no limits of a special diet I could pick what I wanted from the kitchen and since I had one of the best nurses ever she gave me a heads up on how I could order and change things the way I wanted, I could ask for things that weren't even on the menu and I could order extra things and they could save it in the nurses fridge for later so if I got hungry I could eat. I loved it. I also had little stashes of food in the room with me.

Olivia's godmother was the best and brought me some fruit cups and also resupplied my yarn for the blankets that I was working on for the girls. Of course when the kids came for visits they took advantage of the fact that there was all this food in the room, Anthony would help himself to my dinner that I didn't finish...it was funny cause Olivia would yell at him about it. "Don't eat mom's food! She needs it for the girls!" We watched a movie once or twice in my room since there was a DVD player and that was nice.

I really missed my husband mostly though, he was the one that could keep me focused, he is the one that I could talk to or even just sit in the room with for hours at a time and not do anything too special but watch people come for temp checks and monitor the girls. I know that he was bored out of his mind and even worse when I would beg and cry for him to spend the night on that horrible cot or chair he would. There were plenty of times I told him to go home so he could sleep there with the kids and so that he could actually get some sleep without people coming in at all hours of the night. He was my sanity. He still is.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Sunday - October 10, 2010

It had been a long night and now we were onto day two. Cisco had stayed and slept on the little couch that was in the room and looked very tired as well. They decided to move me to a room in the anepartum hall in the maternity ward to wait out the delivery of the girls. There was going to be another injection of steroids later in the day, which I definately was not looking forward to since the last one was so painful. Upon moving to the new room the nurses disconnected me from all of the monitors that were hooked up around my belly and were told by the doctor they had to monitor me every 4 hours to check up on heartbeats and so on. That morning there was another nurse that came in to give an ultrasound to check on the babies and how they were moving and the water levels that were around them. I had grown very tired of laying down or sitting so I was so happy when I had to get up to run to the restroom since that was the only time I was allowed to get up out of bed.

The doctor came in to check in on me and see how things were going. He ordered me to wait until after Tuesday to have to deliver the girls since he was not going to be in town due to a conference he had to attend out of town. I told him I would do my best, but I was also wondering again how long I was going to be in that room. They were hoping for at least 4 weeks to get the girls nice and big and their lungs developed enough so that there wouldn't be too many problems. The doctor was very optimistic on how far I had already been able to carry them without any problems, they said that I at least hit the mark where the girls would be a little safer than if needed to be delivered a couple weeks sooner than now.

So getting settled into my room and trying to get used to the idea that I would be there for a while was hard. Cisco left in the morning to get cleaned up and bring some much needed items for me to survive the day. My mom said that she was going to bring the kids in the afternoon to visit which would be nice, but since there is a time limit at night I was not looking forward to them leaving. I think the hardest thing that I was going to have to deal with was Cisco working and the kids being in school. I was going to be alone most of the day and at night I couldn't ask Cisco to stay at the hospital, it was just too uncomforatable and there was Kipper and the kids couldn't just stay with my mom all the time.

There were some very important people that came to visit with me that afternoon and early evening which made things a bit easier, but I was just so lonely. The nurses were great and came to visit quite often and we got to know each other pretty good in that first day. There was one nurse that was asking on the names that I had picked for the girls and I told her Catherine, Cecilia and Charlie. I had picked out who Charlie was going to be from the very begining (She was at the top of my belly right above my stomach) and at that point she was my favorite, she was firey and kept me company in the late nights when I was working. The other two slept most of the night and kept me up when I was trying to get some sleep durning the day. I told the nurse that Cisco and I thought that Baby A would be Catherine, since most of the time she was sleeping and like a little princess she needed her beauty sleep. Baby B was going to be Cecilia since I had already picked out Charlie. It was decided and the nurse put it up on the little white board to keep me focused and so that when people came to do check ups they could call them by name and not A, B and C.

I was so tired of getting blood drawn. I know that they had to do it, but I was just so tired of getting poked and prodded at. Temperature checks and blood pressure. I think the worst was when they would have to come in and do the monitors on the girls. It would take forever for them to get a good beat on them since they were moving all the time. Once they would get one someone would move. I think Cecilia was the most difficult. There were times where we would be at it for an hour just to find their beats and keep them there. The monitoring had to last for a solid hour of beats...good luck. It would take about 2 hours sometimes, there were other times where the nurses would call the doctor and find out if they would be able to stop or try again in a few hours. They would find a beat and I would have to lay so damn still so the girls wouldn't move, however, my back would hurt, my legs would go numb, I would have to pee...there was always something that would make it near impossible to get a good beat on the little ladies.

The kids came that night after they had done homework and had dinner and at that point there was only about an hour for them to visit and I would always hope that the monitoring would be held off until they left so my visits wouldn't be interrupted. The nurses were great and would wait. they would tell me about their day and I missed them so much. I was so sad when they had to leave. I just wanted to go home so bad. I guess it would have been nice if I had had my computer :)

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Saturday ~ October 9, 2010

I was feeling bad bad bad that day. I was just tired, my body was just plain pooped from carrying 3 babies around for all that time. I had a really rough night at work the day before and actually went home early. I had so much pain in my belly pretty low down, where when I think about it now it was where Catherine was laying. It was so bad I was brought to tears. I told the Manager I was going home and he tried to argue, but I think he figured he better let me go. So I went home and slept, slept as much as I could. Drank a ton of water and put my feet up that day. I just lounged around all day, I just wasn't feeling good. We weren't too busy at work and I wasn't completely worried about calling out for that day since I was still not feeling too hot. Anthony went to my mom's house that day and it was fine with me because that meant I didn't have to worry about cooking dinner and keeping track of any kids. I ended up getting hungry later that night and decided I better figure something out, I called my mom to find out what they were doing, she said they were going to Applebees and wanted to know if I wanted to go. I figured I might as well since I was feeling a bit better and I was hungry like a Pooh bear.

I dragged my sorry butt upstairs to change and when I pulled my pants off to get some on that fit I felt water come down my legs and drip on the rug. I looked down and saw it was not clear, my thought? "Um...I don't think that is pee...why is it pink?" Well the first call I made was to my mom to tell her I couldn't go to dinner, and I told her I think my water broke, so I said I would call her back since I needed to call my doctors. I called one, no answer. Called the other...no answer. Oh crap. That's not good. Well I just kept calling and leaving messages. Well when 15 minutes went by and I still had no answer I figured I better get my ass in the car and drive to the hospital.

So off to Summerlin Hospital I went. Luckily on the way there one of the doctors called and said that I should get to the L&D right away and he would call and let them know that I was on my way. I called my mom back and begged her to meet me there until Cisco got there. She said that when they were done eating that she would be there. I wasn't thrilled with that but what was I going to say?

So I went and checked in. Told the nurses what was going on and they proceeded to have me change in a gown, went down to see if my water did actually break and found out yes indeed it did. I wasn't going anywhere. So when they went to put the baby monitor on I laughed. She asked me what was wrong, and I reminded her I had triplets, she must not have known and laughed. So she had to go and get more cables and wires to hook me up to. While I was being monitored and waiting for the good word from the doctor or the nurses my mom finally walked in. I was so happy to see her. We tried calling Cisco and told him what was going on. With it being a Saturday night they were busy and he was going to get out of work as soon as he could and wanted to make sure that my mom or myself was keeping him updated with what was going on that way he could leave sooner if need be.

The nurses came in with a big needle and said to roll over...well since the babies were preterm I needed to get a steroid shot so that it would help develop their little lungs should they need to be delivered early.

A few hours later they moved me into a labor and delivery room and kept me hooked up to wires. A doctor finally showed up (unfortunately for me it wasn't my doctor) and was monitoring me and seeing if I was dialated (which would have been bad news) and checking the babies heartbeat. It was the worst feeling with my water being broke, I had to go pee all the time and I know that the only reason wasn't because of carrying the girls. I just felt like I was going without wanting to since I was leaking so much. Plus, being on my back made me so sick and nearly passing out. Horrible I tell you.

At about 11 or 11:30 that night Cisco came walking through the door, but was funny was how fast he came through the door, like he was racing to be first. My mom and I sent him home to get nice and comfy since he would be spending the night on the in room couch.

It was a restless night, nurses in the room every 3 hours like clock work. Feeling like I was constantly wet and leaking, thirsty, doctor coming in to check on the babies heartbeats, and just uncomforatable in general. I was so thankful when I was able to get up out of bed to go to the bathroom, minus unhooking from everything and making sure I didn't trip on everything I was pulling with me. Cisco was wonderful, he would wake up to help or check on me to see if everything was ok.

I was so hoping that this would be a fast process...

Sunday, March 27, 2011

September 11, 2010...

Our wedding day. I was about 6 months pregnant with triplets and I definately looked like it.

It was a beautiful day. We had an awesome suite at The Signature at MGM, two right next to each other, one for the boys and one for the girls. However, the girls suite was bigger and much much better, top floor, balcony you could walk out on, huge bathroom, small kitchen. It was perfect for all the company we had in our room that day.

Waking up that morning, I was excited but not as much as I thought, I think I was more nervous. I was nervous that no one would be on time for the hair dresser, the make up and most importantly getting dressed and out the door. The hairdresser was on her way and guess what...no one was there but me and my kids. Cisco had gone to pick up the photographer and get Anthony's little tux...I called him freaking out about how my mom hadn't shown up yet and neither had any of my brides maids. It was horrible. I was ready to throw in the towel right at that moment. Right when I got off the phone with him a knock at the door...my mom had shown up. Thank God!

Then everyone else pretty much started streaming through the doors. Lunch was delivered by my wonderful bridesmaids and their husbands, it was such a laid back afternoon in the room. I loved it. No stress, no crying, no worrying. It was great. We all walked down to the salon to get our makeup done and that was great too...except for when we had to practically run back to the room to get dressed so we wouldn't be late for the limo. I was worried about how I looked, I just felt huge. I know I was pregnant with triplets but still, you are supposed to be all skinny and fabulous in your wedding dress.

The only time during the whole day I wanted to cry before my wedding was when we were getting off the freeway which was right next to my venue. Thanks to my bridesmaids talking so much the feeling fleeted right away. Getting out of the car it was non stop. The photographer started snapping right away and the videographer did the same. It was a great experience the whole way around. I think the worst part before the wedding was when I was left all alone in the dressing room. I was left there with my nerves and anxiety...it was horrible!

The wedding coordinator came into the room and told me that it was time. I was the last one to go outside. I stood in the door way and I could see the whole procession take off, one of those people being my husband to be. Someone that I hadn't seen all day and all I saw was the back of his head. I was so scared I would fall, or cry to the point of ruining my make up something.

With my dad on one side and my step-dad on the other side I walked down the aisle toward my fiance. I didn't fall, I nearly cried, but I made it to his side. As I walked up to him my dad had stepped on my very long veil and pulled my head back...it was pretty funny. I stepped forward again and took my fiance's hand. We listened to our pastor as he told us things that were important in being husband and wife, he recited passages to us, he helped us through our vows and he assisted us and Anthony and Olivia in lighting our unity candle bringing us together as one family. As we exchanged our rings and eventually sealing our commitment with a kiss the only tears that were shed from near by were those of our children.

We walked back up the aisle hand in hand, finally husband and wife. When coming to the rest area after the ceremony Anthony was crying so hard it was difficult to understand him, let alone trying to console him. Anthony crying made Olivia cry and then it was just a matter of settling them down so we could do pictures.

After doing all the photos it was time to party hard. That part was going to be a challenge for me, but I was willing to give it a try. I didn't eat dinner since I was so very sick to my stomach, but I was able to drink water and dance until I just couldn't dance any longer. When the cake cutting came up that was hard, I thought I may have needed a moment for that only because I didn't think I would get through it without being sick again. I did, but I didn't even get to taste my own wedding cake...that was such a shame.

Everyone told me to enjoy your day because it goes by so fast and it's true. I didn't think that I would believe it, but it's true. Before I knew it, it was time to get in the limo and head back to the hotel. I was ready too, my back hurt, my feet hurt, I had to use the restroom so bad because all night I refused to go since it was such a hassle with my dress and everything. When we got back to the room I nearly gave Cisco a pair of scissors to take me out of that dress so I could run to the bathroom. After that all I wanted to do was get into the giant jacuzzi tub and soak. When I went to bed that night I was hoping that I would sleep until 3pm...but I couldn't because we were heading out for our very close to home honeymoon that was ordered...

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Now What...

So the news of three was out. Our older kids Anthony and Olivia had mixed reviews. Anthony was kind of happy when he found out about one. But when two came along he threw a bit of a tantrum (he was 11 at the time) and then when three were discovered...good luck. It took a whole lot of convincing that he would still be loved, he would still have one on one time with me and dad and most importantly that he wouldn't be forgotten. After all of this was done and said, then he fell into it a bit better. Olivia on the other hand was excited with each discovered baby, there was no tantrums from our 12 year old. I think she was so excited about our babies coming so that she could help and most importantly probably hold them for hours at a time.

So now what, we knew about the three...we talked to each of the kids, the usual, "you know when the babies come things will be different right?" and then there was the wedding planning that was still getting underway.

Yes, that is right. When finding out about our babies we were in the middle of planning the much awaited function of the century. After 10 years my love had finally asked me to marry him on Thanksgiving 2009. So we were, or I was anyway, busy planning the wedding of my dreams. But now I had to factor in the fact that I was going to be VERY pregnant by the time the wedding came. I had already bought my dress, I had been going to the gym like a mad woman so that when the time for the fitting came along I would be able to size down my dress, bought the shoes (which seemed like a joke after I thought about how big I was going to get), and the plane tickets for the honeymoon were already booked.

Well now, I had to take my dress that I loved with all my heart back to the bridal store and trade in the same one for a bigger size (I called it my Orca dress), find new shoes (I decided on a cute pair of flip flop sandals, since heels would be out of the question), and after speaking to the doctor I knew that going to Florida for the Disneyworld trip of my dreams was going to be a far far away dream that was going to take many more years to achieve.

I had to definately do my prioritizing. Wedding first, babies later. It was all going to be back to back so I was going to be very busy.

Wedding being the priority was a must but very difficult. I was tired all of the time and sick sick sick. I couldn't keep anything down. Crackers...nope. Toast...nope. I could barely hold down water. It was such a struggle to go to work every night. The only good thing was that I sat behind a desk and was practically alone all night. I planned my wedding in between sleeping, eating and throwing up. Sometimes it never seemed as if it would get done, but slowly it did.

We slowly began getting ready for babies too during it all, our den that had pretty much started being a room for the kids as well as us to store things into was going to be the nursery, with some handy help from my dad, brother and husband. The room was an open space upstairs that needed a wall and a door to be enclosed, so there was some work to be done there.

I swore with the stress of it all I thought I would go into labor, but my doctor was just amazed at each appointment of my "Cervex of Steel"...the cervex you never see in multiples practically. I was just so proud I thought I should have the picture framed or something, he bragged to the assistants about it all the time, I thought I should start charging!

So as the summer started to pass and grew bigger with each day my anxiety would begin to mount more and more. I had a bad experience with delivering Anthony and I just knew that delivering these babies wouldn't be much of a cake walk either. I was also worried about the wedding. This was something that I had plastered in my head for years and years and now I had three other people to take into account...

Thursday, March 24, 2011

In The Beginning...

And in the beginning there was one...then two...then three. Natural triplets. How in the hell does that happen and how does it happen when there is no history and no miracle drugs. "One in a million" that's what Cisco says anyway, I think it's smaller, but either way it's a big number.

We had the first doctors appointment on May 5, 2010 and then saw Catherine. After a long long while of trying for a baby we were finally going to have one and we saw the tiny beginnings of our baby. So very tiny and small growing bigger every day. The doctor said everything looked great and he would see us back in two weeks.

Two weeks later he wanted to check in on Catherine to see how she was growing. Well the ultrasound machine that he was using didn't pick up a clear enough image so we needed to use the bigger and better machine in another room. The technician was looking and moving around and tells us, "Well they both have good heartbeats". "What do you mean two?" that was our reaction. She looked at us wondering why we were surprised. I think it occurred to her that we didn't know about the two until just then. She confirmed again, pointed them out and then proceeded to go and get the doctor. Shock and disbelief filled our faces. She gave us a little picture of Catherine and right next to her was Cecilia. The doctor said that I needed to come back in another two weeks so that he could see how the babies were progressing. I called my mom the minute we left the doctors office because I was so excited and I just still couldn't believe that I had two little babies growing inside my belly. She didn't believe me so much that she drove up to our house to look at the pictures.

Well two more weeks went by and so did another doctors appointment. Cisco couldn't go to this one since he had to work, so I went solo. Just a small check up on the little babies to see how they were developing. I laid down on the table and let the tech do her thing. She looked around, baby A was doing well with a nice strong heartbeat. Baby B was growing, she looked a little smaller but she had a good heartbeat and was growing since the last time she checked in on her. Upon looking around my belly more she said she saw another baby. She moved the little wand around and said that she indeed saw another heartbeat. "You are joking" was all I could get out. "You cannot be serious" was the other. It was just too hard to believe. I was trying to get used to the thought of two babies, and now this woman was telling me that I had three hanging out in there. I've never seen someone run out of the room to fetch a doctor so fast. He couldn't believe it either. I had to be seen by a high risk doctor as well as him so that I could be monitored closer. When leaving the room and waiting for the phone number all the nurses were so excited and happy for me. They told the doctor that he wasn't allowed to send me into that room anymore. It seemed that every time he did they found another baby. I told them not to worry because I wasn't going to be going in there any more either! They printed out another picture of all three babies and right above Catherine and Cecilia was little Charlie.

I went to my car, cried in disbelief, cried in misery, cried thinking about how my life was over, cried wondering how I was going to fit into the wedding dress that I just bought with triplets. After crying I took a picture of the ultrasound and sent it to Cisco with the message..."CALL ME NOW!!!" It didn't take long to get a phone call back. "What the hell?" was what I remember him saying. I told him the story in the doctors office and after that there wasn't too much more to be said, we were having three babies and he was at work when he heard so he had sit and think about that all night. That must have been fun....